Brock Lesnar vs John Cena (WWE Extreme
Rules 2012)
So, it's been a while since I have
actually watched this TBH. We all know how great it is and we all
know how frustrating it is once it's all over. So I'm looking forward
to seeing one of the definitive Brock Lesnar performances.
First, we had Brock's MOMENTUS RETURN
on Raw:
That fucking pop
Best wishes to John Cena's hat
I remember at the time, it wasn't that
long since I came back to watching wrestling after a hiatus and there
were rumours that Lesnar would be at Wrestlemania 28. I was giddy in
my excitement at the sheer prospect of his return that I wasn't sure
it would turn out to be true. But it was and it was glorious.
Then the main build up was one of the
best in recent times IMO. Yes, we had that really long Lesnar promo
about his feelings on Raw, that was totally out of his comfort zone
that he apparently got straight on the phone to Heyman and told him
to get himself a deal with WWE, ASAP.
But we got the wonderful brawl on Raw
between Cena/Brock that ended up with Cena getting bust the fuck
open.
We also got the first of the Brock sit
down interviews;
“I'm not a superstar, I'm an
ass-kicker”
Set the whole tone perfectly for the
'Extreme Rules match at the next PPV. Yes, we didn't have to wait
long.
Cena was in for the match of his life.
Would he survive? Could he survive?
So, here we go.
Weird looking back now seeing Brock
come out without Heyman by his side. He's also rocking his UFC
sponsors all over his shorts lol.
Cena comes down with a chain/padlock
around his neck,
Someone say THUGANOMICS???
Wonder if that'll come into play later
on.
Hot crowd and obvious big fight feel to
this one. Huge anticipation.
The bell rings and Cena runs straight
for Brock, but gets took down immediately and Lesnar starts the
ground and pound with HUGE nasty elbows to the skull of Cena. He then
nails Cena with one hell of a stiff clothesline (this is something
else we hardly see him do now tbh)
OUCH, We can already see where this one
is going.
Ref is already checking on Cena and
Lesnar doesn't give a shit and is just like “Come on, get up”.
Cena is up and manages to get a grip of
Brock from behind and takes him down, but Lesnar quickly takes
control again and starts lamping Cena with strike after strike to the
head. The ref intervenes again to check on the now open wound on
Cena.
CENA LEGIT BUSTED OPEN HERE
JUICE, JUICE, JUICE
Here comes the WWE doctor to help clean
up the blood gushing from Cena. Lesnar of course couldn't give a fuck
and smirks away whilst pointing and mocking at how this happened.
As soon as the doctor is finished with
Cena, Cena gets straight back up and again runs at Lesnar, but is
again taken straight down and Brock just continues to hammer away at
Cena's head. Brock just will not stop and delivers a vicious knee
into the midriff of Cena, before kicking him out the ring. Cena is
slowly getting back up with the help of the referee, but Lesnar is
just standing in the ring, mocking Cena with a 'Come on' gesture.
Cena manages to roll back into the ring, but his head is gushing a
lot of blood still, so the doctor has to come in again a tend to the
open wound.
Cena just gets back to his feet as
Lesnar comes running straight at him, but Cena manages to catch him
with an elbow and gets him up for a possible AA. Lesnar reverses this
and delivers two German Suplexes to Cena to remain in full control.
Lesnar tries again for another Suplex,
but Cena starts fighting back with some elbows to the head of Brock.
He manages to break free and runs off the ropes towards Brock, but as
he hits Brock, he also hits poor Charles Robinson, too.
REF BUMP ~!!!!!
Cena takes this opportunity to again
run off the ropes towards Lesnar, but Lesnar is back up and hits Cena
with a shoulder barge.
Just as Cena starts to get a little bit
of momentum, Brock just says “I don't fucking think so”, and he's
cut straight off.
Lesnar lands another stiff punch to
Cena's head, right on the wound.
THIS ISN'T PG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Brock again hits Cena with another hard
club to the head. He then wipes the blood onto his chest and licks it
THIS ISN'T A FUCKING WRESTLER, THIS IS
A FUCKING CYBORG MACHINE
Cena goes to the corner, seemingly for
the chain, but Lesnar catches him with a blow to the kidney. He then
hits him with a couple of his patented shoulder slams. Cena is really
hurting now, but of course Brock doesn't let up and we see the WWE
debut of the KIMURA LOCK. The ref is knocked out, so Brock can apply
this painful hold for as long as he likes. Lesnar finally releases
the hold by throwing Cena shoulder first into the turnbuckle, sending
Cena out of the ring.
See, it's subtle psychology that can
makes all the difference.
Lesnar just starts doing his dance in
the ring, soaking up all the heat from the crowd. Lesnar goes to the
outside and reapplies the Kimura briefly, before sending Cena flying
into the barricade. He then flings Cena back into the ring. Just
before Lesnar re-enters the ring himself though, he notices that
chain that Cena bought in with him.
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHIT
Brock wraps the chain around his right
hand, before thinking “I don;t need this, yet” and abandoning it
and kicking Cena instead. He follows this up with another hard,
vicious, nasty knee strike into the gut of Cena. Lesnar then wraps
the chain around the legs of Cena and tells him to “Get up”
Cena eventually does get up, but Brock
runs him over straight over flat, with another big ass clothesline.
Lesnar then picks Cena up and dumps him
upside down over the turnbuckle, with Cena's legs still tied up with
his own chain.
Cena is just defenceless, tied up and
helpless, as Lesnar mocks him and starts clubbing away with big blows
to the head. Lesnar goes back to Cena's bad arm and starts slamming
into into the ring. He lets Cena loose by dumping him on his ass,
before going over to the referee, who is still flat out on the
outside. But he notices Cena is getting back up, so he goes over
first and kicks him in the gut, but Cena starts to fight back with
some rights of his own, but again is quickly cut off by Brock and is
sent crashing into the steel steps.
John just can't catch a break atm
Brock then goes back to 'check' on the
referee. He goes over and
PICKS THE FUCKER UP WITH ONE HAND AND
DUMPS HIM BACK INTO THE FUCKING RING
LEGIT ONE OF THE GREATEST SIGHTS IN
THIS DAMN COMPANY, OR ANY. I just love how casually Lesnar does it,
too.
Well, that should finally wake the ref
back up. Brock goes over to make sure he's still compos mentis,
before going back to target Cena, who is just crawling back into the
ring. Cena tries to pick the chain up, but Lesnar quickly grabs it
and throws it to one side. Cena gets back to his feet and picks
;Lesnar up for another AA attempt..........but Brock reverses it
again and goes for the F5. Just as Cena is coming down, he
inadvertently kicks the ref down again
REF BUMP NUMBER 2 ~!!! Poor Little
Naitch.
Lesnar, not realising the ref is bloody
down AGAIN, goes for the pin. Another ref comes running down just in
time for the count.
1,.2.............................2.9.
CENA KICKS OUT!!!!!! Big pop from the crowd for this, they are
warming to Johnny boy, here.
Brock gets up and looks at the new ref
like “THAT WAS A FUCKING 2??” A pissed off Lesnar gives the ref a
clothesline from hell and kicks him out the ring.
Lesnar is now like “WHAT THE FUCK CAN
I DO NEXT?”. So he goes outside and gets the steel steps and brings
them into the middle of the ring. Oh, and more officials come to
ringside now so we should be ok for refs, now
“YOUR'E ABOUT TO FEEL THE PAIN IN THE
WORST WAY, DAWG” - Booker T.
Lesnar then gets onto the steps and
poses likes he's the king. Well, he is at this minute.
Cena then does a very defiant “You
can't see me” mock to Lesnar and starts firing rights at Brock, but
Brock cuts him off with a knee and puts Cena right back into the
Kimura Lock..............this time whilst on the steel steps. Cena is
screaming in agony here as Lesnar strongly applies the hold and he
just won't let go and there is no ref around to stop it.
A loud 'Let's go Cena – Cena sucks'
chant starts up as they are again coming around to supporting him
here.
Cena manages to sum up the strength to
pick Lesnar up and dump him right onto the top of the steps to
finally break the hold. Cena's arm looks like it's about to fall off
here as he gingerly goes up to the top turnbuckle as Lesnar is
sprawled out on the steps. He flies off the ropes with a leg drop,
but Lesnar is wise to this and moves out of the way and Cena falls
flat on his ass instead. Cena is hurt as he rolls out the ring to try
and get some rest and halt this onslaught. Brock is just getting back
up and is looking around, wondering where his prey, I mean Cena, has
gotten to. Brock stand up on top of the steps to scout for Cena and
sees him just getting back up on the outside.
Lesnar starts dancing and mocking Cena
as he slowly watches Cena get back up onto the ring apron. Brock then
runs off the ropes, off of the top of the steps, and flies straight
for Cena..........but he misses and he goes flying over the ropes and
nearly blows his fucking knee out.
Lesnar though, still doesn't give a
fuck as he starts smiling at this experience and raises his arms in
celebration.
HE'S A FUCKING MACHINE I TELLS YOU!!!
Brock gets back into the ring and
continues to celebrate lol and carries on to soak up the heat from
the crowd. Lesnar gets back onto the steps and is gesturing to Cena
to get back up.
DON'T SAT HE'S GOING TO TRY THAT AGAIN
FFS??!!!
Cena is again slowly getting back onto
the ring apron. Lesnar again flies back off the ropes, off of the
steps and again flings himself towards Cena.....................but
this time he's met with Cena punching him right in the
head.....................and Cena as that chain wrapped around his
hand as he does it.
Brock's selling is wonderful here btw
as he's grabbing the ropes and trying to make his way back to his
feet.
One armed Cena is now feeling it and
the crowd is fully behind him and is willing him on.
Lesnar is now BUSTED OPEN as Cena waits
for him to get back to his feet. Just as he does, Cena hits him with
a AA ONTO THE STEEL STEPS
Little Naitch is able to make the count
now too.
1,2..........................................................3.
CENA BEAT BROCK
Yup, CENA BEAT BROCK
More than a shitty ending to a fucking
unique, brutal, special, one of a kind WWE match. Oh and no –
I AM NOT WATCHING OR DOCUMENTING
ANYTHING THAT HAPPENED AFTER THE 3 COUNT, EITHER
NOTHING ELSE HAPPENED
NOTHING
So where to start with this anomaly of
a match. I guess i'll start with the glaring negative and that is the
result. I'm pretty sure 99.9% of people would agree in saying that
Brock should never have lost his first match back. I understand Cena
had only just lost to The Rock and all that, but I don't care, they
could have easily had Brock win and Cena would have recovered, still.
It's such a deflating feeling after sitting through the most surreal
WWE match in years that it's the one thing some people will remember,
rather than all the work that went into the previous 20 minutes. It's
something that happened and time hasn't made it look or feel any
better TBH.
So that out of the way, we can talk
about the multitude of positives that this match bought. First of
all; Brock's performance after 8 years away was nothing short of
incredible. I can't even say 'Monster heel', because he was so far
beyond that in this match. He bought the UFC to the WWE in a perfect
mash up of styles. He didn't just bully Cena, he brutalized him to
such a degree that you didn't know what the fuck you were watching.
It was a single performance that just hadn't been seen that your eyes
were fully glued on Brock throughout.
His mannerisms, his strength, his
style. It was astonishing. He didn't need to move at a million miles
an hour to victimise Cena either, he just slowly made his way around
the ring in such a calculating manner that you just didn't know what
he was going to do next.
I'll give credit to Cena too, here. His
selling was spot on, he made the best of the few hope spots he had in
the match and he turned that crowd fully around into fully supporting
him at the end. They were willing him on and wanting him to win.
Credit to of course to Lesnar, who put in such a commanding heel
performance that it made the crowd turn on him.
It was a match that we hadn't seen the
likes of in a long time, a performance we hadn't seen the like of in
a long time and haven't really seen since TBH. We didn't see much of
actual 'wrestling' here, either. Hey, Lesnar only used two suplexes
:brock4
Ending aside, it's an incredible piece
of high drama that it belongs in a category of it's own.
